I don’t like the Royal Family. It isn’t a matter of disliking the Monarchy per se, it is more personal than that for me. I just don’t like the individuals who make up the “Firm”. Charles is a bumbling bafoon. Camilla is a vicarious usurper. Andrew and Edward are a pair of pillocks. Philip is a pompous oaf with his head so far up his own Royal Arse he can practically see out of his nose, and the Queen is equally busy disappearing up her own Royal Backside. All of the Queen’s offspring, with the exception of Edward, have been divorced – hardly a great advert for stability. Above all else they are full of their own Self. The only exception I would have given to this would have been Diana, but she was not really a Royal other than by virtue, or otherwise, of her marriage to Charles. To this I now cautiously add Catherine.
Catherine asked Philip on her Wedding Day “What is the secret of long life?” Philip replied rather pointedly, “Do as you are told and avoid getting on the wrong side of me.”
The paradox with the principle of our Monarchy is that I believe we need them. That statement of course sticks in my craw! I watched the Wedding on Friday, as most people probably did, and considered that when it comes to such pageantry, ceremony and colour, that no one, without exception, does this like we British. No where in the world does the rest of the world clamour to see such pageantry and ceremony. Unfortunately the Monarchy are at the heart of all this regalia.
In spite of that I am at heart a Republican. The Royals are paid far too much for what they do and yet they bring so much more in terms of value than they cost. It is for me heads you win, tails I lose. It simply seems to be a no win situation to argue for the Republic. Catch 22 you might say. Or is it?
I suppose you can argue in favour of the Monarchy as an entrenched British establishment that look good, are steeped in history, are aloof and have mysticism beyond expectation. There is no doubt, from a fiscal perspective, they add an enormous sum to our coffers through their allure to the foreigner and the consequential tourism they afford as a result. Occasions as common as the Changing of the Guard to annual events such as Trooping the Colour attract a lot of foreign money. Even symbolism such as the Beefeaters at the Tower contribute to the daily spectacle that is or that represents the British Monarchy.
That for me though does not necessarily justify their continued existence in their current form. The Monarchy is a hangover from a bygone age and has no real relevance in this progressive modern society. As a spectacle they are no better than a circus (albeit a spectacular one). The heir, Charles, is out of touch with everything that is not Camilla; the Queen and Philip were never in touch at all; the offspring may have glanced at being in touch but that soon disappeared. So that just leaves the current adult generation of the Monarchy – in essence William and Harry. They are going to have to buck up their ideas if they are to have any chance of taking the Monarchy further. I really doubt they can which for me leaves them out in the cold.
The only justification for the Monarchy remains their attractiveness to foreigners and the revenue they are able to generate indirectly from tourism. Is that enough to continue with the Monarchy? Perhaps for now but their time is running out and the Republic beckons.
